Seeking Your Parenting Path: Using Queries to Find the Way

by Harriet Heath

This book is a guide for parents who want to nurture their children lovingly and thoughtfully by asking parents:

• What is the situation about which you are concerned and/or in which you see opportunities for growth?
• What are all the ways you and any interested others can think of as ways of dealing with the situation?

Parents then ask which of the ways that they have brainstormed are:

• True to my Quaker faith and beliefs?
• Opportunities for modeling and teaching the testimonies and values?
• Considerate of the needs, feelings and individuality of each person involved?
• Possible given the circumstances in which I am parenting?

The ways thus selected make a plan.

Parents mindfully live their plan.

They review their experience and contemplate next steps.

The book is used during the workshop, Parenting Mindfully and Creatively discussion series.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Table of Contents

Where are we going?

1. I. Maintaining a Close Relationship with Children
   1. Nurturing Relationships
   2. Breathing Exercise
   3. Tuning into Your Child Exercise
2. II. Planning
   
   1. 1. What is the situation?
   2.        Being Mindful in Retrospect Exercise
   3. 2. What are your choices?
   4.        Brainstorming Exercise
   5. 3. Guides for deciding which options to implement:
          Planning
   6.        What are your beliefs?
                Indentifying Beliefs Exercise
            What are your values?
                Identifying Values Exercise
            Analyzing a Value Exercise
                What are the needs of the people involved?
            Seven Basic Needs Chart
                What are their feelings?
            What are the individual characteristics of those
            involved?
                Developmental level
                   Development of Thinking Chart
               Temperament
                   Identifying Temperament Traits Exercise
               Learning style
                   Identifying Learning Styles Exercise
               Interests
               Previous experiences
               Physical make-up
            What are the family characteristics?
               Family patterns
               Routines
               Traditions
               Styles of communicating
           What are the conditions in which you are living?
               Parents’ energy
               Time
               Financial security
      
   7. 4. Making a Plan
            Molly’s Plan to Guide Her Children
      
   8. 5. Implementing Your Plan
            Molly’s Implementation of Her Plan
      
   9. 6. Reflecting on Your Plan
            Molly’s Reflections